Yvonne Has a Cunt

Good morning everyone. Though I am sure everyone who reads this, is still in bed. Just because all of you are jobless lazy fucks. Did I say that out loud? I meant I love you all. I go to Guelph today after work for Cracktoberfest. I am really fucking pumped about it. If there is anything I should be at, it should be at anything to do with Leftover Crack. Oh! I don't know if I mentioned this is in my blog yet. But Leftover Crack are coming to Toronto!!!! Jimmy and I are going to go. We might go to their show in Hamilton as well the night before. That is how much we love them. It kind of disgusts me to think that it is quarter to seven in the morning and I have been up for an hour. That means I probably will have a twenty four hour day today. With plenty of booze ingested between now and then. I need some 40's. Someone remind me to get some today. Who am I kidding? I would never forget. Kris and Sadie and Mike are coming to my place this afternoon then hitching a ride with me to Guelph. I haven't seen Mike in a while so I am excited. I should probably not mention that I fucked his ex.

But jesus, would it be deliciously awkward. I live for those moments. Just act ignorant and have no idea that people ACTUALLY give a shit about their exes and that anything other then my perception is rediculous. Then a reaction doesn't really manifest itself obviously. Just something that the observant could pick up. Boys. Always PMS'ing. Sooo territorial. I am pretty sure those human being walking around with cocks created the idea of ownership. We seem to be the possessive douche bags of the world. Even I can be. Remember when you were young and you would get mad at other people for hanging out with your friend? Especially your brothers or sisters? Come to think of it, I was raised far different then you all. You needed to be territorial to survive with the fuckload of kids I grew up with. I am pretty sure I am a fast eater because you wanted to get done first so you got seconds. Because there sure as hell wasn't enough for everyone to have seconds.

Fucking meal times was like being in a nazi boot camp. Only one of the ones where the Nazis were nice and gave you seconds and didn't put you in ovens because you were Jewish or black. Though I am neither of those things. I am 100% superior baby. Relax. I am just joking kids. "Jesus. Did he just say that?" Yes I did. Why? I don't know. I am tired. I tend to say the things that make people squirm no matter what state of mind I happen to be in. But this morning I am particularily giddy. Maybe it is all the mainlining of coffee. And my Morning shot of a Negro virgin's blood. I have no idea why I capitalized "morning" there. I am still out of it I think. I am in this weird head space where I can't capture whole and complete thoughts and my brain is all over the place. I kind of like it. I am actually having to watch what I type too. Because I am missing important letters in words because I am trying to type as fast as I think. Which I have discovered is pretty fucking fast. All this time I thought I was mentally capable. Or is it handi-challenged?

I can't remember the politicall correct term. Oh now I remember. Mentally deficient. Oh I am going to put a picture on this blog post of my first day wearing my Necrophagist shirt. It is pretty fucking awesome. You will all see that. But none of you will appreciate it as much as me. But it is my blog. So what else are you going to do but share what about the world excites you with the world. Though I doubt the world reads this. But a few important people that mean the world to me do. Or maybe I mean the world to them? I think the best is if it goes both ways. Anyways I am going to wrap up for the day Queers. I am talking to Tom. He is gonig home next weekend. So we are talking about a double date and shit. He is going to see the woman as well. And he is inviting me over to watch the game tonight as well. Which I will. And have sex with him probably. Anyways. I hope you all have a lovely Halloween holiday. Pretty homosexual holiday if you ask me. Costumes and make up. Only the gays are that gawdy. I hope you all have a lovely day. Cheers!