Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck..

So everyone. After all that. My DSM postponed for two weeks. Bitch. Actually I am sure she is a lovely lady. Kind even. When she isn't bleeding from her orifice to clean her uteral lining. Which seems to be never. I just got off the phone with my Mother. Lovely lady. She is gonig through something I can tell. Whenever she goes through a rough time in her home, she tries to make it better by talking to me about Jesus and telling me I need him in my life. To which I assure her that I definately do not. What a stupid position I get put into. Just for making a decision that the rest of my family hasn't made. I can believe in bullshit, or I can break my Mother's heart by making her think I am going to hell. Those are righteous choices right there. My title, is at the character limit. Which is what I was trying to find out by spelling fuck over and over again. I wonder how many times I spelled it? Yesterday I went shopping for work clothes. I brought the dress code policy and tried to use there guidelines to look as unproffesional as possible. Boy did I succeed. It wasn't to hard either.

I am only allowed to wear, black, white, or beige. No skirts above the knees. (Boy was I tempted to get a skirt). But I decided the best way for me to do it is to look as goth as possible. So I bought some nice little outfits that middle aged people may think I look evil. But I already have a customer base and boss who love me. So I can for sure do this. Plus it is within the guidelines. I am sure you have all heard of this new video blogging thing that is sweeping the world. I of course have put thought into it. Wondering if I want to get into that medium of blogging. I have a cam. I would just need to get a mic. I am tempted too. But I am also wondering if it would just get rediculous. Because now you will be conscious of facial expressions. It will be tempting to do stupid little rants that seem to be all the rage. Kids all feel there opinion is the most important. And it probably is. But these are the questions that cross my mind at the thought of video blogging. Plus it seems lazy.

I like to sit down and concentrate and compose something by typing it out and thinking of it. I figure if I am just talking to a cam, I am more likely to say stupid shit. Though stupid shit can be enlightening from time to time. Lately I haven't been talking to people I usually talk to. Except for Jimmy of course. I very rarely don't talk to that boy-o. But Lesley. I have talked to very little. She is a square. She has been spending her time drinking, fucking, and doing homework. Those crazy kids and their "activites". I actually in all reality have no idea what has kept her busy, except for homework. Which is over rated. You all know that. Does anyone know what "hoobitron" means? Does anyone know what polyethylene is? Is that the chemical name for plastic? Stupid internet. We are a plastic addicted nation. I am reading an article on it. So That is why I assumed that was the chemical name for it. I got my Summerfolk ticket. I got the days booked off. I am psyched about it. I want to be so fucked up while I am there that the music doesn't bother me. But that shouldn't be a problem.

Plus I will be in the company of people I adore. So the music won't really matter. I am mainly doing this to be with a bunch of my friends I hardly ever see from up north. I want to spend a few days with them this summer. Especially Lesley and Jon. I heard Abby may be camping with us as well. Which would be kickass. She is alright by me. And some other people Jon mentioned to me. But I forget their names because I don't really know them, so there name didn't make an impact on me. Did anyone watch the absolutely insane weather last night? It was awesome. Horizontal snow and rain switching in seconds. I honestly at points thought panes of glass were going to go. Where you might ask? I don't know. But they seemed scared. Scared enough that they wanted to leave. I could hear there groans.

I want there to be nice spring weather for the weekend for when Will comes. I want a California Sandwhich badly. I don't see relief in sight. So maybe I will have a bowl of cheerios and *sigh* to myself that it is nice to not be starving to death. I do try to appreciate my food and my comfort and warmth. We take it for granted far to much. I am glad I don't root through garbage for my next meal. So be thankful people. There are people who are toddlers digging around in shit for food. It is sad that we don't feed everyone. Ahhh well. These will be problems we will always have I think. I have grown tired of writing all of a sudden. I hope you all have a lovely day. Cheers!