Pain Versus Faded Memories (first post of the new year!)

So I was thinking about memories coming and going. How as I get older my memories as I was young seemed to fade. But not all. I was thinking about how someone who impacts your life positively and how they are more memorable. But even then, someone who gave you change at some point or a cigarette. You still forget them. But what you always remember and never forget is pain. I don't know whether this is just me or everyone. But even when I broke my arm when I was really young. I still remember the shirt I was wearing. The bracelet that was on the wrist I had broken. The green and pink softball I got at harvey's with my value meal when we ate out later after my operation. I would never be able to forget anything about the day of my electrocution. I will never forget who broke my heart. That legacy can stick with someone forever. Because pain is impossible to forget it seems. It fades. But it never goes. It is making me try and be even more careful with my actions. I don't want to be remembered by pain I have caused. Though it will happen. I am human and not by any means infallible. I had a great weekend in Toronto. Nicole came up from Montreal to spend New Year's with me which made me really happy. We went to Courtney's party and stayed there until a little after midnight. Then we decided to be elitest and go back to Jimmy's and just hang out with us few ones. It was Jenna (the twin), Dave Power, Mike Dowdel, Nicole, Jimmy, some really trashed teenager Jenna brought that was soo fucking drunk in Jimmy's bed. Haha. I kept encouraging him to take advantage of having a beautiful blonde drunken 17 year old in his bed before her boyfriend came to pick her up. But Jimmy was too noble. Or at least in front of people. Haha. Deep down he is still a man. I got a great blow job... Ahem. Jimmy and I were drinking a fourty of tequilla all night. Souza Gold. Really tasty stuff. Mike gave me some beer to. Dave gave me some rum. Nic gave me some shitty vodka. Jimmy, Nicole, and I smoked stogies to ring in the new year. Those big brown dicks. Mmmmm. I love cigars. Then today after Nicole left. Jimmy, Mike, And I watched some soap operas and a bollywood film while really hung over. It was awesome. Then I made us delicious home made mac and cheese with my infamous cheese sauce. When I say it is infamous I am just trying to make it so by saying it is on my blog. My life is going pretty well. Sometimes during the quieter times when my life isn't so busy and distracting. I feel pretty hurt and sad. But I am moving on. Trying not to be angry. Trying not to do stupid shit. Just basically trying not to react in anyway. My reactions are usually a bad idea. Usually when you give something time and thought. Your opinion on what is a good idea can change drastically. Sleep on every decision before you follow through is my new policy. But my life is pretty busy between work and social life. Maybe I am ignoring these problems. And some psychologists say that is bad. But honestly I haven't seen any good come out of focussing on it. So in the end I think I am handling things fine. Just hopefully I am not that guy who shoots up a McDonald's later on. Anyways. I think I will wrap this one up. I hope everyone will have a better year then the last. I am pretty sure I will. This past year was very difficult for me. The hardest of my life. But also I have grown more this past year then any other year. So I am starting this one off in a good place I think. But no worries. I am still the opinionated Trevor you all know and love. Those who don't like it can suck a dick. Mmmm. Dick. Now the truth comes out as to why I have to go...