Groggy headed..

I just woke up. So my brain feels fuzzy and I like it a lot. Most of my blog posts are in the morning. It is a time that is nice and quiet. I feel very peaceful. I also feel really fuckin' exhausted. I didn't sleep last much. Last post or the post before I talked about Charles. Well the cat is out of the bag. I don't know how I feel about that yet. Mostly because I am tired and kind of apathetic. Plus I have not had to deal with a reaction yet. Don't worry. The day is young. Things can still go to hell. It lost me a shitload of sleep last night. I think I fell asleep finally three hours ago. I am going to be fucking exhausted at work today. But, whatever doesn't kill you will only maim you. A good maiming is neccasary every now and then. I think it might snow today. That breaks my heart for some reason. I was hoping global warming would keep that stuff away all year. But that is just wishful thinking. I am listening to the radio right now. Apperently they found some old woman who legally is not covered under OHIP at all and she needs emergency heart surgery. Everything is about fucking money. We should just give her the damn surgery. I would let her borrow my OHIP coverage if she needed it. I don't plan on needing medical attention for quite some time. This is going to be a stressful day. I can feel it. But stress keeps you on your toes. So there is really nothing wrong with it. As long as you don't let it eat you like a cancer and drain all your energy completely. If you are stressed about making mistakes you will probably make less of them. Right now I am very stressed that I made one. But that is a good thing. I am concious about the big fuck up I could have fucked up. But at the same time part of me is glad I revealed Charles... or maybe I am lying. Or stupid. Or really smart and things will be just perfect and I overreacted like a little girl. Ohhhh drama. We wouldn't have shitty soap operas without it. Then life wouldn't realy be worth living. Anyway I am going to sign off of this for now. Maybe go beat my head against some cement to see if I can catch the echo.