An Elegy of Icaros

Good morning kids. I got in an eleven hour sleep last night. I felt pretty depressed last night for some reason. So I did something that I don't really do anymore. I got drunk by myself. I am not sure why I felt down or anything. I just seemed to be wallowing in self pity for some reason. So I just stuck to it by myself. Didn't talk to anyone. Didn't do anything to perpetuate or justify how I was feeling. In fact I stayed very anti-social. It was a very foreign feeling. Which is probably a good thing. I haven't really had depression wash over me in sometime. So it was a new experience feeling depressions as a new, and unfamiliar head space. I think I am all good now. I guess there is no way to know for sure. But since I couldn't pin point why I was feeling that way, I guess there is no way to pin point that I completely feel better. But I do feel better I must say. I feel like my completely normal self this morning with an additional hang over head ache. But those I can deal with. If not, we have great inventions like pills to take care of what I don't think I can handle. Coffee is my cure all anyway.

So I barely touch tylenol. Coffee and cigarettes have most of the time in my life gotten rid of any head ache I have had. It is hot as blazes out today and I have to walk to the bus stop. It is going to be pretty brutal. I decided to tie my hair up because when it is this hot, I like to not have my hair trapping in my body heat. I like the wind to be able to gust over my ears and shit. It would be nice if we could walk around naked. What a stupid fucking law that you can't. I can't even go onto the bus topless. Is that bullshit or what!? My nipples too much of an eye sore for the elderly? They would probably find my piercings sexy if anything. Especially the safety pin that through my right nipple right now. Or they are just jealous that there bodies are too decayed to be able to be as comfortable as I am topless in public. Either or, it is rediculous that I have to wear a shirt on the bus. We put too much stock in mammory glands and genitals. Can't show tits. Can't show dicks. Can't show cunts. Even though none of us are a stranger to any of those things.

If I know someone who hasn't seen any of those things, please, make your voice heard. I don't consider my cock any more sacred than any other part of my body. It is just as sacred. As in I won't cut it off because I like what I use it for. But I would do the same for a finger, a toe, or my nose. Damnit! I am drawing a blank here. I think that means I need a cigarette. I will be back after I satisfy my craving. Ok back. I was smoking and talking to my beautiful friend Jacob. Talking about Europe and New York. He would make a fucking awesome travel companion. I want to travel with the boy sometime. He is travel savvy. Hopefully he speaks French as well. I am sure he does. He lives in Montreal. I am a single language man. Though I would love to learn Italian. Such a gorgeous language. I have learned words here and there from my boy Luigi at work. He is teaching me to be suave in his mother tongue. He is off today which is unfortunate. I won't see him until Thursday. Because I am off tomorrow.

I always miss the boy when I go a while without seeing him. When he was in Jamaica I missed him a hell of a lot. I made cracks at him that I had no idea Italians tanned. Now I know. He was quite a bit darker when he got back. He was telling me how he trimmed his massive amounts of body hair before he went. I took cracks at his manly hood for that one. Haha. Then he was telling me his wife got a brazillian wax for it and how it was beautiful to fuck a vagina that resembled a three year olds. Haha. What a man. Jacob is learning how to Tango. I am pretty jealous. I would love to learn. Ever since I saw Al Pacino tango in "Scent of a Woman" I have wanted to learn. Al Pacino makes everything look cool though. Jacob is such a womanizer. He has a girl flying up from Nova Scotia to fuck the shit out of him. Haha. Oh man. I can't wait to go to Montreal and hang with the boy. Drinking expensive martinis and probably cocaine will be involved. Haha. Someday I think I need to live in Montreal before I settle and buy a house here. Just to have that experience.

Haha my kitty is getting mad that I am not paying attention to her. My attention is already split between this and Jacob. Which makes it difficult for me to get into a flow. But how can I not have this engaging of a conversation? Impossible. I think I am actually pretty caught up on my sleep now. I have an abundance of energy now. I don't feel at all the negativity I was feeling last night. I feel very prepared to tackle my day. I have to place the order today. I got to keep it as small as I can though. While making sure we don't run out of anything. Because we have very little storage space available at this point in time. Haha. My boss loves to go on vacation when things are a little tricky. But I figure I mine as well tackle these things now then I am prepared later when it is actually my responsibility if I fuck up. Right now it would be hers because she is the manager. But I haven't fucked up yet. I miss you kids that I haven't seen in a while. I am sure it will happen soon enough. Unless I die in some freaky way. Which I hope happens. I want a news worthy death. I think I am going to wrap this shyte up. I am not talking about much. Not that that matters. But I like to put my full attention into things. So I am giving up on this. Cheers everyone!